Car dealer slang...not always nice!

These are some of the terms used by car salesmen (and maybe a few intrepid saleswomen), according to both a longtime poster and a newbie in the forums on Edmunds.com. (Thanks, "mackabee" and "greenpea68" for the list.) A lot of these words are not very complimentary to the putative customer; that's for sure.

in the box = finance office or business office

the tower = sales manager’s office

squirrels = customers with no loyalty to one salesperson

bumblebees = customers that can't decide between three or more cars

Disneyland shoppers = same as bumblebees

strokes = time-wasting shoppers

bogues = same as strokes

ghost = customer with no credit score

roach = customer with bad credit

a player = customer with strong credit

fairy = pipe smoking, folder carrying, internet customer

mooch = customer that wants floor mats, alloy wheels, satellite radio, etc, "thrown in," usually on a mini-deal

laydown = customer that walks in and pays sticker for a car

grape = same as laydown, as in "I stepped on a grape"

mini-deal = salespeople eating cheese sandwiches with no cheese (low-commission sale)

cherry = a very nice trade-in

rough = the opposite of cherry

sled = a beat-up trade-in (same as rough)

clam = same as a sled

skate = salesmen or women who steal customers from fellow salespeople; commonly known as thieves

snake = same as a skate

hand shaker = manual transmission

get me done = customer with terrible credit but can be financed, usually at very high interest rates

mop and glo = paint sealant and fabric protection

rust and dust = rust proofing and undercoating

delivery coordinator = woman with a big smile that sells mop and glo, rust and dust

"club them like a baby seal" = selling a car for full sticker!

grinder = “negotiates” for hours down to the last penny

pack = just another way for dealers to take money away from salespeople

front end gross = gross profit over invoice price less pack and shop fees

back end gross = gross profit in the box (finance or business office)

spiffs = daily or weekly bonuses for salespeople

stuff holders = storage bins

CSI = customer satisfaction index, inversely proportional to the amount of gross profit on the deal (that is, happy-go-lucky emotional buyers pay more; miserable analytical people pay less)

double nickels = $5500

pounder = $1000 front end gross: How many pounds was that? = a deal that has 2 or 3 thousand front end gross

home run = 4 pounder or $4000 or more front end gross

third base coach = someone at the negotiating table who is telling the buyer they don't have a good deal

spoon = a salesperson who gets a done deal from a manager

hook = same as a spoon but you might have to do some work

house mouse = a salesperson who gets all the spoons or hooks

veteran = a salesperson with more than 6 months at a store

greenpea = novice salesperson

rat = a trade that is a clam or a sled

$1 car = any trade that is worth $1000 or less; usually in real money only worth a dollar

team player = the only person who goes and gets coffee and lunch every day

"RUNNER !!!" = what is yelled when a customer gets up from the negotiating table and proceeds to walk out the door. The customer gets up and the salesperson says, "We got a RUNNER," one of my favorites...

Actually, I have found through reading Edmunds and the other car-buying sites that you ought to plan to be a RUNNER. That is, there is a plethora of information on the Internet (including detailed online dealer inventories) that should enable you to confidently walk into a dealership and offer YOUR price. Then if the salesperson comes back with a rejection from the sales manager, you head for the door. If you're not emotionally tied to the idea of buying a particular car from that dealership on that day, you are likely to have someone run out to intercept you accepting your offer!